i'm sorry, world

[spacefragments]

fera_festiva's HBP uberwank:

So at the end of the last chapter, Harry either sucked Draco's cock or has his nose broken, depending on whose version you prefer. Either way, when this one begins, we find our hero lying on the floor of a train compartment with his face covered in one of two bodily fluids which, I'm told, have a pretty similar chemical makeup anyway.

(...)Next, Tonks fixes Harry's broken nose (if we go with the broken nose version of events, or, I guess... fixes his smudged lipstick, if we're going with the oral sex version? OK, this is one of the points where my version doesn't quite hold water).

---minnow_53: "Tonks fixing his smudged lipstick reminds me that she'll be able to do the same for Remus soon..."

-----nk_aoede: "i just had an image of tonks putting whore-makeup on a remus in full drag."

-------minnow_53: "Well, I hope you'll draw it then, freaky though it may be... :D"





take a long look at this because it might be the closest thing to r/t i will ever draw.

also, "caption this picture" game, anyone?

Comments

[red_squared]

HOMG MY EYES!!!!

You're supposed to draw SIRIUS in drag. Sirius.

Although I do approve of Remus' sparkly red top. And his thoroughly disgusted expression.

D:

[spacefragments.livejournal.com]

maybe he and sirius were going to have a private drag party, but since remus sucks at the makeup thing he had to ask tonks to assist him??

not that she seems to be doing a very good job either.

[brighty18.livejournal.com]

Wow! I pray that Tonk's Metamorphagus skills make up for her lack of cosmetology skills. Yet Remus looks properly appalled.

[fullmoon-dreams.livejournal.com]

OMG - what a picture. Someone needs to write a fic around this.

*Looks hopefully at Brighty18*

No good at captions, and unfortunately the only thing that came to my mind was something rather crude about where the lipstick was going to end up.

[mysecretashes.livejournal.com]

*points at screen and collapses into highly disturbed hysterical laughter*

Possible captions:

Queen for A Day

Drag, Not Slag (meaning Remus, of course)

[captainpookey.livejournal.com]

HAHAHA.

I was in a bad mood but this definitely helped.

I like how Tonks just looks kind of bored. And I really like both of their hair. :D

[duck-or-rabbit.livejournal.com]

LOL

I love Tonks fingers and her nice, fit little ladyshape. Remus on the other hand... even Tonks is unsure this is a good idea but good for her!

[spacefragments.livejournal.com]

it is so not a good idea.

[spacefragments.livejournal.com]

oh he is very much a slag. but only for sirius. ;p

[mysecretashes.livejournal.com]

Haha, very true. :D

[rev02a.livejournal.com]

(Later that night)
Tonks: Mum, do you have time to talk?
Andromeda: Merlin, when was the last time you flooed your mother? I've been worried sick, don't you know to check in with me?
T: Sorry-- look, Mum, not much time to talk, but I need to ask you something...
A: Sure, sweetie.
T: Was Sirius gay?
A: Clearly, daughter. Didn't you read POA and OOTP?
T: Mum, I was in OOTP.
A: Then why are you asking me this? You aren't still trying to shag Lupin are you?
T: I helped him get all dragged up tonight--
A: Yes, well, Love, I did tell you to go after that Weasley boy...

[elsane.livejournal.com]

*SPORFLE*

The thing that really makes this picture for me is that his eye shadow is the exact shade as her hair.

well, that and the expressions. hee!

[spacefragments.livejournal.com]

i bet sirius is much better at it. *nods*

[spacefragments.livejournal.com]

on sirius's cock? YOU KNOW IT.

[spacefragments.livejournal.com]

thanks! i was going for bored/fed-up. hahaha.

[brighty18.livejournal.com]

Yeah, he strikes me as the type who could easily master eyeliner.

(frozen comment)

[brighty18.livejournal.com]

Hmmm...

[spacefragments.livejournal.com]

hahahahahahah! although, i hear gay!charlie is the new black.... erm. i guess that expression works in more than one level here.

[spacefragments.livejournal.com]

haha, it was all purple at first, bit it needed a little something else. :p

thanks! remus wasn't supposed to look so disgusted, but he had his way.

[elsane.livejournal.com]

they both just look so...tired of the situation, in their own ways. Very appropriate for the ship, I say!

[spacefragments.livejournal.com]

haha, yes. if there were any dialogue you know they'd sniping at each other, just from looking at their faces.

[captainpookey.livejournal.com]

I imagine it going something like this:

"Done yet?"

"No. And if you ask me that one more time I'm going to shove this lipstick up your ass. Or would you like that?"

"The lipstick's all going to come off anyway. No need to make it perfect."

"You asked me to do this so we're doing it my way."

"Next time I'm asking Sirius."

"What was that?"

"I said no need to be so serious."

"—Says the guy who asked me this morning if he could borrow my sparkly pink top as if defeating You-Know-Who depended on it."

"What? You certainly never wear it."

[spacefragments.livejournal.com]

LOL

this conversation: trufax.

[duck-or-rabbit.livejournal.com]

My take on the matter:

__

‘You’re quite trendy for an oldie, actually.’

‘Thanks for your handiwork, shaping my brows and all.’

‘You were rather excitable when I tweezed you, yelping like a girlie. Sorry about the gap in the right.’

‘Tonks?’

‘Yes, Cookie?’

‘I’m glad you’re on my side.’
__

[spacefragments.livejournal.com]

did she just call him cookie

oh no she di'int